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Have you ever walked into a room and felt tension in the air? Have you been in a great mood but the moment your best friend scowls about something, you find yourself feeling the same way? Emotions can be more contagious than the common cold. In fact, studies have shown again and again that stress can spread from one person to another. There’s even a name for it: “Emotional contagion.”
A study in Social Neuroscience looked at a variety of hormone changes among a group of people who observed a person going through a stressful ordeal, such as giving a presentation. There was a significant increase in the stress hormone cortisol in the observers. Even though the observers were not going through the same ordeal as the person giving the presentation, they responded to the tense emotions in a very physical way.1
While this works well during moments when emotional empathy is necessary, the problem is that stress can linger so deeply that you could experience a rise in cortisol for weeks after the event.
This is actually a survival mechanism. Humans live in groups, and the animal instinct among those in groups is to pay close attention to one another. The chances of survival among our ancestors were much greater if they were among others and carefully attuned to what was happening around them. That vigilance meant that a person was ready to run or fight at the first sign of danger. In a situation where a predator was coming for you, that stress response would keep you alive. Today, the odds of a predator coming for you are very low. But we still pick up on the “fight or flight” signals that our fellow humans send out, even in the most subtle ways.
Acute Stress vs. Chronic Stress
Acute stress happens suddenly and quickly. It’s the sudden rise in anger when you get cut off in traffic or the rush of sadness when you see an injured animal. These stress reactions are usually temporary and resolve themselves as the situation does. These reactions might actually be good for you, researchers say – they keep you alert to what is happening around you and what is happening with others.
Chronic stress, on the other hand, is a problem. The long-term stress someone might feel during an ongoing and difficult situation can last for months or even years. That long period of high cortisol levels (and the rise of other stress hormones in the body) can lead to negative health effects.
According to the Mayo Clinic, prolonged stress responses can lead to:2
· Anxiety and depression
· Headaches
· Muscle tension and the resulting pain and soreness
· Problems with sleep
· Digestive problems
· Weight gain
· Difficulties with memory and focus
· Serious health problems, including heart attack, stroke, heart disease, and high blood pressure
It’s important to note that if you are experiencing any of these problems on a regular basis, looking into an alert system for elderly adults is a great idea. Many of the symptoms of chronic stress, such as sleep problems and muscle soreness, can lead to a higher risk of falls. In addition, the health problems that build over time – such as high blood pressure – are good reasons to have a medical alert handy, just in case you face a medical emergency.
Avoiding chronic stress is vitally important. Fortunately, there might be little ways to avoid “catching stress” from those around you, and there are many ways to cope with it in a healthy way.
Reframe the Situation
There is often unique stress in our day-to-day lives that we can’t eliminate. Maybe it’s a job that really does some damage to your mental health, but you have to go in every day for the paycheck. Or maybe it’s worry about saving enough for retirement, which can turn into an ongoing worry. You might even have a bit of a feud with a family member and the tension when you know they are going to be around makes your stress levels rise before they even walk into the room.
Rather than let the worries take over, try to reframe the situation to see the positive in it. Find silver linings about that job (or take a leap and get a different one). Talk with a financial advisor about ways to maximize your retirement fund, turning the worry into an opportunity. Rather than be furious with your family member, tell yourself that they are fighting battles you know nothing about, and try to extend them some grace.
By looking at the situation through a different lens, you can find better ways to cope.
Practice Emotional Detachment
It can be really tough to feel a flood of emotions but not do anything about them. Ask yourself if the stress you are feeling is really coming from inside of you or if you are “catching” it from someone else. Often you’ll find that you are responding very strongly to what someone else is feeling.
In that case, compassionate detachment can be your best tool. This means that you remain kind and attentive, but you create a sort of mental and emotional buffer between you and that person – you can look at them and feel sympathy, but not become too emotionally invested or try to fix things that are beyond your control.
This can be difficult to do, so expect it to take some practice! But once you separate what you are feeling from the source, you can then think more clearly and not let the stress affect you as strongly as it once did.
Remove Yourself from the Situation
Sometimes emotional detachment is not enough, or the situation makes it impossible to get emotional and mental space. In that case, you might need to get some physical space. This could be as simple as stepping away for a few moments to breathe in a quiet room, or it might be as complex as taking weeks or months away from a friendship.
And it’s very important to remember that if you find yourself in an abusive or toxic situation, get out right away. Removing yourself from a dangerous situation is not only the best practical move, but feeling safer will almost instantly improve your mental and emotional health.
Take Deep Breaths
It sounds like a cliché, but it actually does work. Taking deep breaths slows down the nervous system, allowing your brain to think more clearly. And once you can think more clearly, you can often reason your way out of a stressful situation or at least make it more tolerable. Clear thinking also makes it easier to practice the compassionate detachment mentioned earlier.
A good way to breathe against the stress is called “box breathing.” The idea is to inhale slowly for the count of four, hold the breath for four seconds, then exhale for four seconds. Do this for four minutes. This can calm you down physically so that you can work with what you’re feeling.
Exercise to Get the Stress Out
Stress settles in your body, so getting it out can be a game changer for your health. Exercise can help you do that. It might be a simple as a good, long stretch as you get up for the morning, or it might be a spin class that leaves you panting and exhausted. For most, it’s something in between.
The goal, however, is that the exercise is something you really enjoy doing. Exercise that feels forced will add to the stress you are feeling, but exercise you enjoy is much more likely to give you more of an emotional release.
Consider what exercise you really enjoy and make a point of doing that – and don’t forget to breathe deeply and evenly as you walk around the block or dance around your living room.
Reduce stress even further with the peace of mind that comes from an emergency button alarm. If anything bad happens, you can reach out for help with a single touch.
Start Journaling
Stress has a domino effect. One person is stressed and they pass it on to their spouse. That spouse then calls a friend and vents. But by doing so, they have just passed the stress on to the friend. The friend then goes home and passes their heightened stress to their kids. It turns into a vicious cycle.
You can stop the cycle at the point where you pass the stress on to someone else. Journaling is a great way to do that. By throwing all that emotion down on paper, you can stop the stress in its tracks. The emotional release of writing out what’s bothering you can give you fresh perspective, the time to take a few deep breaths, and a better opportunity to reframe the situation.
Then you can move forward with your day with a more positive attitude. This makes it less likely that you will pass stress along to others, and it also makes you more resilient to additional stressors that might come your way.
Let it RAIN
When you’re not sure how to handle the emotions you’re feeling, consider the RAIN Method. Created by psychologist Tara Branch, the method helps ground you and allows you to process emotions. This is how it works:3
· Recognize: See what is happening and acknowledge it. “I’m upset by the images I saw on the nightly news.”
· Allow: Don’t try to change the situation at that moment. Instead, just allow the emotions to come. Label them if you can. “There is a war happening and I feel so sorry for the children.”
· Investigate: Ask yourself why you feel this way. What do you believe? What emotion needs your attention most – and why? “Children shouldn’t have to face war. I remember my mother’s stories about World War II…”
· Nurture: Now that you have an idea of why you feel a certain way, you can look for positive solutions to the issue. One of those is to nurture yourself with self-compassion. “It’s good that I feel this way. It shows that I’m empathetic. Maybe I can find a way to help.”
Remember that all feelings can be contagious – including the good ones. So surround yourself with positive people! It’s also a good idea to surround yourself with other things that make you happy, from vivid colors on the walls to your favorite music to a delicious coffee drink you always enjoy. Hit all the senses with the things that bring comfort, which will allow you to pass it on.
Anything that brings you good peace of mind can help lower your stress levels. To that end, let Alert1 help you with knowing that when bad things happen, you are never alone. A medical alert pendant or wristband can be your constant companion, there at your fingertips anytime you need help. The peace of mind that can bring – not only to you, but to your loved ones as well – is a great way to prevent more stress.
